ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Just puked most of my soul out..
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
