im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
