At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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