On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
