this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
