absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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