I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
