Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
