everyone is single if you try hard enough
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
