uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
