I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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