my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
