Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
