This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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