i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
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i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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