Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
