its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize