so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
