He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
