Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
