I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Sext me about skeletons
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize