I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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