Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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