Plan B is the new Plan A
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize