The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize