she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Randomize
