Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
