I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
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Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
third nipple confirmed
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My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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