I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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