It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
