S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Randomize
