you guys were way drunker than both of me
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
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how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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