just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
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