So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
