I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
home. puking in laundry basket.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
