Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
