Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Randomize