dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
