Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Randomize
