i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
our cab driver is having phone sex.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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