Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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