The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
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State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
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SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
The air taste purple.
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