so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
