THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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