Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
You made out with two different species that night
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Randomize
