forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
home. puking in laundry basket.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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