If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize