i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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