Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
