This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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