When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Randomize
